So, I've been shaving my Alopecia-ridden head regularly for three years, now. It just got to the point where it seemed silly to hang on to chin-length hair when 1) there wasn't much anyway, and 2) it just got stuffed in a wig. I shave it sometime around every two weeks because when those little hairs start to grow, they stick STRAIGHT up and make my wigs sit higher on my head, thus making me look a bit weird. So, that's why I shave my head. Now on to the actual story...
October of 2007, I was staying with my parents, celebrating the arrival of my sister's new baby. Now, when I am at the homes of my family, I never wear my wig. It just seems silly, no matter who else is there. It just so happened that my sister's father-in-law was also visiting for the occasion and was at my parents' home for dinner. I had only seen him one other time, and that was at my sister's wedding. Obviously, I was wearing my wig then 'cause I wouldn't have wanted to draw any attention to myself in all of my baldness on her most special day. So, when Mr. J (name has been changed as to not incriminate anyone else with the same initials) saw me that night at my parents', I think he was a little taken aback and didn't know who I was. In all of my dad's joking, he said, "Come here, Skee, and tell [Mr. J] how your chemo is going." (Ha ha, hee hee, the never-fail cancer joke that only my family can make in private company.) Hopefully Mr. J didn't take him seriously. I have a sneaking suspicion that he didn't. You'll soon find out why...
We got to talking, Mr. J and I, and he asked me all sorts of questions. He asked me if I'd ever had a mohawk and I had to tell him "Yeah, I had one yesterday, as a matter of fact, but then I shaved it off."
My mohawk. My hair was a little longer than usual so I thought I'd have some fun. If you look really close, you can see it. It only lasted a day, not even a full 24 hours.
I think he was a little shocked, and therefore started assuming other things about me that usually go along with people who have mohawks. He asked me where I lived, what my husband did, and then he asked me something that 1) was a little weird, and 2) wasn't really any of his business. He asked if my husband and I had temple recommends. I found that a little odd, but I told him yes. Where did THAT come from? I asked myself. The conversation continued for a little while. It was getting to the point where I needed someone to rescue me 'cause I had a feeling Mr. J would go on and on and on. Luckily, I had to go help Brady so that was my ticket out of the conversation. WHEW!
I didn't think much of that conversation in the coming days. From the things I had learned of Mr. J since my sister's wedding, I knew he was a bit of a zealot when it came to the LDS Church, so the temple recommend question wasn't completely out of left field.
Not long after I went back to Colorado, I was talking with my sister on the phone. She told me about a conversation she had with Mr. J. I think it went something like this:
Mr. J: "It's great that your sister is getting straightened out."
Paige: "Huh?"
Mr. J: "Your sister I talked with in Utah. It's good she's going to church."
Paige: "You mean Amber? She's never had any problems with going to church. She's always been the 'good girl' of the family."
Mr. J: "Really?! Huh."
I guess he had assumed I was the wayward child because he thought that the shaved hair on my head was a tattoo and the mohawk comment didn't do me any favors, either. I couldn't believe that someone would judge me like that and assume those kinds of things about me. If you know me at all, you know I'm as far from that kind of person as possible. I found the whole thing a bit comical, and just had to laugh at the whole thing. I guess during that whole conversation I had with Mr. J, he heard one thing, made a snap judgment, and didn't hear anything else I told him. He was already set in his opinion of me. Oh well. Once Paige straightened HIM out, who knows what his opinion is of me now.
My "tattoo" - a freshly-shaved head
(If I left anything out, Paige, let me know!)
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3 Happy Thoughts:
What the Heck! Seriously, you are as straight arrow as they come. That's really sad that he made a judgement so fast. People should mind their own business!
Welcome to my father-in-law. A bit sad isn't it? You did leave out that he automatically assumed that you had tattoos and probably had a history of drug use. The "Do you have a temple recommend?" question is typical. At least he didn't ask you if you were in debt, if you are 'worldly', or make fun of you for putting your kids in car seats.
thats so interesting that our remaining hair is almost the same pattern...i can pretty much grow out a little mohawk as well. hm...interesting.
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