March 1, 2010

Still Feeling "Off"



Remember how I posted a couple days ago about not feeling like myself? I'm still feeling a bit "off." I had a good cry yesterday (which, incidentally, wasn't triggered by anything in the slightest) and I'm feeling a bit better today, though my eyes STILL feel like I just got done crying. It kind of reminds me of the time when I had a complete break down right after my little Brady was born, and I ended up having to deal with Bell's Palsy for a few weeks. Now, every time I cry, the thought goes through my mind that I wonder if it would trigger that - the Bell's Palsy - to happen again.

But, I digress...

I really don't know what has been wrong lately. It's not PMS and I'm definitely NOT pregnant. The weather has been great the last few days, and we even took a walk on Friday to go feed the ducks at the little lake by our home. Saturday was productive, but relaxing; and Sunday, I got to go to all three of my meetings for the first time in a very long time (Eli is now old enough for Nursery. Wahoo!!).

I know what my mom would say in this instance, "You just need to get out! Go somewhere by yourself and leave the kids with Brett!" She tells me this every time I talk to her. Problem is, I never feel like being by myself, least of all someplace other than home. I just don't enjoy it. I'd rather it be all four of us somewhere, rather than "just me" somewhere else.

I do need to find an outlet, though. I need to start a new book - one I can actually sit and read, as opposed to trying to find a quiet time during the day to listen to one of my audiobooks. Those moments are too few and far between.

Luckily, the week is still young. I've forced myself to be productive today, hoping that it will bring me out of this slump. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that along with each day comes a much-improved mood.

4 Happy Thoughts:

Erica said...

Sorry you've been feeling "off", I know the feeling. Maybe you guys should get a sitter and go on a date night with Brett! I know going out to dinner and a movie always boosts my spirits :) And a shopping spree at Target never hurts!

Amber said...

You need a girl-friend. Seriously! It is lonely to be away from home and to feel like your only support is your husband and kids (they are a great support system, but sometimes you just need another intimate friend). I read in a psychology book just this morning that women who do not have a strong female confidant are more prone to depression. Call me. I would really love that.

Do you have my number? I don't have yours.

Jeni Allen said...

Everybody I've talked to lately is off, you're not alone! You're always so happy when I see you, I'm sure it will pass!

Erin said...

You'll feel better soon. If you don't, you can always get counseling! :) It is hard to always put on the smiley face and want to face the world.